As a little girl growing up in a small town in the northwestern corner of Illinois, I knew I was Jewish and I knew I was different from all my friends. I had no idea what would open up for me on my journey to strengthen my Jewish identity.
In the 1970s and 80s Sterling, Illinois was both a liberating and a stifling place to grow up. On the one hand, we were living in a safe, small town. Yet, on the other hand, there was no yiddishkeit and no greater Jewish community to be part of. My parents did a wonderful job with our small synagogue and the resources we had. My mom taught us history, Torah stories and mitzvot. Whenever someone came through our town for a short period of time and knew hebrew, we learned from them. My mom is a very smart woman and knew that the one thing she could give us was Shabbat every week. My brothers and I knew that every Friday night, we had to be home for candle lighting, Shabbat dinner and my mom’s challah. Those nights deeply resonated with me.
I also give my mom full credit for understanding that informal Jewish education was just as important. Her search led her to Herzl Camp in Webster, Wisconsin, a zionist camp built on a resort that in the early 1900s did not allow Jews on their property. How ironic! I spent 12 summers there and currently serve on the board of directors. I am a past president of the Board.
In my early twenties, I moved to Minneapolis because I wanted to have more Jewish resources for myself and for my future family. Our three girls all go to public school, belong to a conservative synagogue and attend Talmud Torah after school. This is my happy Jewish life. But, recently we found even more….
Working for NECHAMA – Jewish Response to Disaster, a non-profit organization that helps flood and tornado victims restore their homes to a livable environment, I received a call about three years ago from Rabbi Ethan Katz, who represented an NCSY chapter from New Jersey. Rabbi Katz wanted to bring a group of students to work with us. So, as with any other group, I took care of it; I planned the experience for the NCSYers. The group ultimately worked with NECHAMA in the aftermath of Hurricane Ike in Texas. The Rabbi called once again, wanting to work with us. At that time, I made some inquiries about NCSY and I was told by a friend, “This is the Orthodox youth group.” So, being the small-town Jew along with living in Minneapolis for 20 years, I had the initial response of, “Oh those people.”
Last fall, I found myself staffing the third disaster clean-up experience for Rabbi Katz’s group, right here in Minnesota. I was nervous, worried, overwhelmed [to meet them] but mostly intimidated by the sheer fact that they were mainly Orthodox.
At the same time, my tenth-grade daughter, Hanah, was invited to an NCSY Cholent and Chat. She had dabbled in USY and BBYO, yet just wasn’t intrigued by those programs. In her first evening with NCSY, she was captivated by the NCSYers, the speaker of the evening and the youth director, Rabbi Tzvi Kupfer. Everyone was inviting and excited to have a new member. At that point, she learned about Torah High and started the following week.
Hanah volunteered with NECHAMA during the time that Rabbi Katz and his group were working in Minnesota. Rabbi Katz and a student, Phil Katz from New Jersey, spoke to her about TJJ and TJJ Ambassadors. She was intrigued yet still unsure about the Orthodox aspect. After working with the group from New Jersey, a few more weeks of NCSY programming, Cholent and Chats and Torah High, she and I both realized that being Orthodox was not intimidating at all. In fact, it is the opposite. It is the most inclusive group of Jews we have ever met. We are part of the family.
Most of my friends ask,[ “How do you feel that Hanah is involved with an Orthodox group? Or if she becomes Orthodox?”] My first response is to educate: NCSY is not there to “convert” Hanah to Orthodoxy. My next response, along with my husband’s, has never wavered. “If this is the right path for our daughter, then we support it.” She is happy, she has wonderful new friends, she is included, she is learning in a totally different environment and loving her Judaism. In short, she is part of the family!
Hanah has now been accepted into the TJJ Ambassadors program and went to the Midwest Yarchei Kallah. I am studying with an educator from Aish and I am planning on going to Israel in May with TAG – The Jewish Women’s Renaissance Project. It is a long way from Sterling, but my journey is far from being over.
Amy Cytron is the Volunteer Coordinator and Development Associate for NECHAMA – Jewish Response to Disaster. She lives in Minneapolis with her husband Todd and three daughters. Amy volunteers at her daughter’s schools, sits on the Youth Commission at her synagogue and currently serves on the board of directors of Herzl Camp.
